Mar 29, 2010

My son, the a--hole

At Chick-fil-A the other night, I broke out my usual questions about the boys' day. LITTLE DID I KNOW.

Me: "Jakey, did you have a good day?"

Jake: [nods head]

Me: "Nick, what was the best part of your day?"

Nicholas: "Playing outside."

Me: "What was the worst part of your day?"

Nicholas: "Walter C called me a name."

Me: "What did he call you?"

Nicholas: "Daddy, YOU tell her."

Grayson: [raises his eyebrows]

Nicholas: "If YOU don't tell her, I WILL."

Me: "Just tell me, buddy."

Nicholas: "Walter C called me an ASSHOLE."

Me: [stunned]

Nathaniel: "WAIT. Did you say 'ASShole' or 'GAShole'?"

Nicholas: "ASSHOLE."

Me: "SHHHHHHHHH. That is a terrible word. Be quiet!"

Nathaniel: "But I didn't hear him. NICK, DID YOU SAY 'ASSHOLE' or GASHOLE'?"

Grayson: [hisses] "STOP THAT RIGHT NOW. Do NOT say that word anymore. Do you understand me?"

Me: [thinking that we are sitting smack dab in the middle of the one-and-only Christian fast-food chain] "BOYS. If you say that word at school, they might call us to come take you out of school. It is VERY serious and I never want to hear you say that again."

Meanwhile, I almost had tears running down my face from the effort it was taking not to burst out laughing. I mean, I know Walter's mom and I know she would be 10 different shades of mortified. I cannot IMAGINE her face when the director relayed the story to her. And NOW we just have to convince our boys not to say it the next time they are overtaken by anger.



paige said...

I'm sorry to laugh at your pain, but that is funny. I can see it all happening in my head.

Don't you just love kids? :)

Sarah T. said...

Wow. That is hilarious. I wonder what behavior on Nick's part elicited that word (not to "blame the victim.")

Sewconsult said...

Does Walter have an older sibling? I'm afraid your trouble has just started. It's amazing how fast kids pick up bad words.

Rachel said...

Oh goodness. It's so nice to know that we aren't the only ones dealing with charming behavior at school. I'm sure you had a hard time laughing, we've had to stifle a few this past week as well.

Katie said...

Oh Kat! One morning I was cleaning up the breakfast aftermath when I heard 2 year old Will saying to 1 year old Mabry "Mae Mae, dis my asshole. Where your asshole? Is dis your asshole?"

O...M...G... So, I immediately came running in to the living room to find Will with his handy manny gas can putting gas into his dumptruck. Then he said (ever so innocently) to Mabry "Here Mae Mae, put this in your GAShole."

I almost had to make myself a drink...

Katherine @ Grass Stains said...

Beckie, yes, Walt has an older brother. I'm sure that's where he picked it up!

Katie, I can't BELIEVE you had the same words (albeit not really) in your house! That's too funny. I never would have come up with "gashole," but I guess it makes sense to kids.

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