I should have known

I should have known when we went to take our Christmas card pictures and Amelia laid down on the sidewalk within three minutes of our arrival at the park and cried.

She pulled herself together, but she wasn't ever able to muster up a smile, either for family shots or individual poses.

I should have known.

She was pensive, and she was pleasant, but she wasn't participatory.

I should have known.

I wouldn't find out until the next morning that she had bilateral ear infections and conjunctivitis (pink eye), so she was feeling horrible all day. Poor baby.

I feel like a dog. I should have known.

Instead, I did the only thing I knew to put a smile on her face ... I asked her to run to me.

And even in her sick state, it worked.

Only briefly, but it worked.

All I needed was a glimpse of the little girl I knew was in there, the one we know and love.

Our sweet, smiling Amelia.

But even a month later, I'm still left with the feeling ... I should have known.