Oct 13, 2011

The story to come

I'm finally beginning to type.

It feels funny, because it's been so long since I sat down with purpose to write here.

I know that many of you may be against medicating for some -- or any -- reason. And I understand that.

But during my recent unexpected, extended hospital stay, I swallowed virtually every dadblasted drug they offered me. All I wanted was to be fixed, to be competent and comfortable enough to be with My People, the people I missed more than anything in the world. I WANTED TO SLEEP, which had eluded me for nine nights. NINE. FULL. NIGHTS. I had become a mere shadow of myself, and I didn't know the way back.

But they all talked among themselves and worked out a schedule of meds that helped me sleep, lessened my anxiety over NOT sleeping, and helped me start feeling human again.

So when I was finally judged well enough to come home, I came home with a page full of medications.



I no longer have a pill box. I have a Morning Pill Box:



And an Evening Pill Box.



And BOY does it feel like a TON of medication, which -- as I said -- I know some of you might frown upon. (I'm not that fond of it either.)

So I am making a request of you, that you would please refrain from judgment as I begin to tell my story of the last two weeks. Right now I'm ecstatic to be here ... with you, with my family ... to be getting a good night's sleep and to have my blood pressure managed.

I've missed this, and I'm glad to be on my way back.

18 comments:

RLR said...

So glad that you are home and feeling better. Can't imagine being separated from a newborn - and so sorry that you had to go through that.
As much as we may want our bodies to work the way God intended, sometimes we DO need some help. That's why God made doctors, right?
I think you are SO courageous for being this honest with all of us - some of whom you have never met (waving hand).
Prayers for you and yours. Take care!

stollison said...

Modern medicine rules. Love you!

ginmommy said...

Girl, no judgments here.

Kirsty said...

I'm glad you are back!

Plain Chicken said...

So glad you are home and on the mend!

I've missed your stories!!

Sewconsult said...

No judgements. People who judge haven't been in crisis. Meds are wonderful when needed!
Hugs and prayers,
Beckie

Corrie said...

The nurse in me firmly believes that God can heal, and often He does so through medications that have been developed. I am glad to hear they were able to find a combination that is working for you!

momof4inNY said...

No judgement here! I was against medications also, until I had a child who needed them. I wish you the best in your recovery and look forward to reading more from you:)

Wanda Wilkinson said...

God does heal and a lot of times He uses modern ways. He allowed some of His people to be doctors and scientists to develop ways and means to help us. Then he expects us to be smart enough to use His methods

I am so happy you are home with your family and are sleeping again. Enjoy being well

Love

Maureen said...

thinking of you and wishing you well. not a judgment in sight, just glad you are getting the rest you need!

Jenny said...

So glad you are back and medicine is a wonderful thing! You have to do what is best for YOU and your family! HUGS!

Martha said...

Oh my gosh! Who cares how many pills your swallowing! You're home! And your getting healthy! Blood pressure is not something you mess around with! I'm just so glad you're well (ish?).

Erin said...

I've been there. It was, and still remains, the most traumatic thing I've ever been through.

The medicines they gave you helped you make it through to the other side and they will continue to help you as you heal.

Go easy on yourself. You're doing just what you're supposed to be doing. Those beautiful little ones all need their mama and what you're doing is ensuring that you'll be there - and be healthy - for a long, long time.

Meredith said...

I'm so glad you are home and feeling better. Missed you and wish your family well!!

Natalie said...

hey girl..if drugs were not meant to be used...they would not have been made. I saw a thought on pintrest yesterday that this post made me think of. it goes" you know my name, not my story. You have heard what I've done..not what I've ben through." PEople better lay off the judgements...and I think for the most part of it..people understand. THere are simply things that are out of our control. And medicine is there to help the things that we personally can't . Keep getting better.

Mrs. L said...

Take care momma...

Green Door Girl said...

Oh my - I just checked in to see how things were going (the last I read was in the hospital) and holy cow - the last two weeks have a been a whirlwind! I am so so glad you are home now and honey medicine is made for a reason and you NEED this - Amelia needs her mommy healthy, sleeping, and able to take care of her and her brothers and daddy! By the way Amelia is so stinkin cute - seriously the picture from yesterday or the day before -swoon! I also love her nursey... I am so glad you are home and getting some rest! Take time, we don't need an update just yet!

Me, the boys and a Farm... said...

So glad you are able to be home with your family and Amelia...having a 4 and almost 3 year old boys and just had a baby girl...I can't imagine being away from them for over a week. So glad you are on the mend...

Amelia is a beautiful fit to your family!
Best wishes!

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